Should I have married at 18 when I had time to court? (Donald McLean, Correspondence to Ethel Waxham Love, 1909)
If they were willing to take the time and make the effort, American society during the late Victorian period provided young men and women with many opportunities to meet. One method was the system of calling. A proper call, or visit, lasted no more than ten or fifteen minutes. If the young lady called upon was absent or unavailable, the gentleman caller left a personal calling card. The lady responded with a return call or card if she desired to continue the social relationship. If she didn’t, the polite gentleman went looking elsewhere.
Gentlemen Callers
According to etiquette, men were expected to “retain gloves upon the hand during the call” in honor of the fifteen-minute time limit. Also, a well-bred man would never put his hat down on a chair, but would hold it in his hands at all times. This was an indication of control and responsibility. After all, if a man could not tend to his own hat for fifteen minutes, how would he ever manage a wife for an entire lifetime?
Once a lady chose to receive a young man (and she could receive more than one at a time), he could present her with a gift of flowers, candy or a book. Anything more expensive or of a more personal nature was deemed inappropriate and could be rejected — along with the suitor. A proper young woman could not offer a man a gift until he had given one to her. She could, however, send birthday or holiday greetings in the form of written correspondence, commercial greeting card or postal card. A photographic portrait, sometimes taken by a traveling photographer who set up shop at a local hotel or county fair, was also a popular memento for one sweetheart to give another.
Physical contact was considered the height of Victorian intimacy, therefore closely monitored by society. A young lady, for example, was never to take a gentleman’s arm unless he offered; and, unless they were engaged, it was improper for a gentleman to offer a lady his arm during daylight hours. Many courting couples, however, found ways to get around this: roller skating and ice skating gave young couples the chance to hold hands in public. Piano duets were also popular because the couple could not only share the piano bench, but could occasionally touch hands while reaching for the keys.
Pleasures of the Ballroom
One of the most popular forms of contact among courting couples in all economic classes was dancing. This was in spite of complaints by those who thought that such amusements would distract young women from meeting their family responsibilities. Critics who worried about the “fleeting and unsubstantial pleasures of the ballroom” did not find a sympathetic audience with young men and women who wanted the physical closeness and private conversation which dancing so easily allowed. But, in the early years of this century, dancing was as controlled by etiquette as every other activity, and certain traditions had to be followed.
When she arrived at a dance, for example, each young woman received a dance card on which young men signed up for the various dances. Some of these might include the two-step, the one-step or the waltz. The successful social strategist filled her dance card at the start of the evening with the names of men she liked. An unanticipated opening on her program was considered embarrassing, especially for a popular young lady. Sometimes even the most fastidious girl danced with fellows she didn’t favor, just to avoid being thought a “wallflower.”
Cutting — refusing to dance with someone once his name was on the program — was not considered proper unless the man had behaved badly or had paid too much attention to another woman during the evening. To avoid being the object of such gossip, a proper young lady never danced more than two dances with any one man unless they were seriously courting.
Long after many Victorian customs disappeared, the use of dance cards remained. While this system was not perfect, it at least allowed young ladies to have private time with the men they favored and to politely limit the unwanted attentions of men for whom they did not care.
play football the way we do. On the left you have soccer rules, and descriptions. On the right you have football rules and descriptions. In the middle are the things that both sports have in common.
or about plants. Maybe you’re going to talk about the definition of a habitat and this is going to be an expository essay. (Remember Expository means information or background, when we were talking about the structure of stories). In your expository you will probably want to give examples of different habitats, such as rain forests, or deserts. Maybe in the desert subtopic you want to talk about the role of nurse plants that take care of young plants by protecting them from the sun. Then you might want to give examples of different plants that do this. Drawing it out like this will help you to see that one end of your drawing is more focused, and this will help you narrow down exactly what you want to write about.
watch. (All nouns)
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on either side thereof. Thrust emanating from the propulsion units is deflectable to control at least the vertical positioning of the airship.
were drawn and the fire burned brightly. Father and son were at chess, the former, who possessed ideas about the game involving radical changes, putting his king into such sharp and unnecessary perils that it even provoked comment from the white-haired old lady knitting placidly by the fire.
His three listeners leaned forward eagerly. The visitor absentmindedly put his empty glass to his lips and then set it down again. His host filled it for him.
He hated the way he looked. Last week he did fifty sit-ups a day, thinking that he would burn those already apparent ripples on his stomach to even deeper ripples, dark ones, so when he went swimming at the canal next summer, girls in cut-offs would notice. And the guys would think he was tough, someone who could take a punch and give it back. He wanted “cuts” like those he had seen on a calendar of an Aztec warrior standing on a pyramid with a woman in his arms. (Even she had cuts he could see beneath her thin dress.) The calendar hung above the cash register at La Plaza. Orsua, the owner, said Alfonso could have the calendar at the end of the year if the waitress, Yolanda, didn’t take it first.
His mother clipped coupons from magazines and newspapers, kept a vegetable garden in the summer, and shopped at Penney’s and K-Mart. Their family ate a lot of frijoles, which was OK because nothing else tasted so good, though one time Alfonso had had Chinese pot stickers and thought they were the next best food in the world.
parked his bike against the peach tree and sat on the back steps, keeping his head down and stepping on ants that came too close.
and sharpened by the progressiveness of distant Latin neighbors, were still large, florid, and untrammeled, as became the half of him which was barbaric.
contained inhabitants Of as undeleterious and self-satisfied a class of peasantry as ever clustered around a Maypole.
warns him that he must leave and take all his workers with him. But Leiningen figures that he’s smart and that he can take control of his fate by conquering the ants.
